Privacy Policy: MINE! They’re all MINE!

gollum emails

I refuse to share your information with filthy hobbitses.
It’s preciousssss to me.

When you subscribe to this website, register for an eCourse, or contact me directly, you are giving me permission to use your email to contact you back.  You are also giving me permission to quote you on my blog if I get the hankerin’.  (So beware, Meanies!)

As a Christian, I try to serve others and show kindness as much as possible.

Except

with

emails.

With those I’m 100% un-repentantly selfish.

Any information you share to choose to share with me is going to be hoarded.  Picture me as a virtual Scrooge McDuck, swimming laps in a giant vault of paper strips.

What if your baby grows up?

Children grow up.  Usually.  (I’m threatening to send mine to Neverland.)

At some point you may find that, as a teenager, you know longer need my diapering and feeding advice.

IF THAT HAPPENS

  1. Don’t panic.  (Teenagers can sense fear.)
  2. Click on the “unsubscribe” button at the bottom of every email.

I will then put your information on bier, float it out onto Lake Michigan, and light it on fire with a flaming arrow, Legolas-style, shaking my fist at the sky and sobbing:  “Why? WHY?“.

All Interesting Posts Must Come to an End

Yes, I know you’re sad to see this INCREDIBLY THRILLING post come to a close, but I really have nothing else to say on the subject.

…except two things.  *eye roll*

  1.  If you would like a peek at my 2nd most thrilling post, the Disclaimer Post (cue Toy Story aliens), you can find it here.
  2. I may update this privacy policy at anytime, when I have a Crap-I-Forgot-to-Mention moment.  If I do, I’ll post a “shout out” on my blog so you can check it for changes. Yet another reason you need to subscribe… (Just sayin’)

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